I went dahn ta da ARM'inee store wit my friend Richard awn Tuesdee. I'll note here that a really fun thing to do while you are in the Armani store, whether for food or fashion, is only pronounce the word "Armani" like ARM'inee-the same way you pronounce the Termini (TERM'inee) bakery i n South Philly.
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We opted for the prix fixe lunch special, which was $44 per person and came with four courses (including coffee or dessert), plus an amuse bouche.
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That free basket of bread was the first and only item we could afford to consume on the menu, but, when in Rome, eat at Armani.
When they left it on the table you and I both whispered, " Class." The (warm!) bread basket they brought was a bountiful offering to Ceres. "A selection of your prettiest items, Per favore!" Very pretty!" in rounds.Ĭaity: I said that when our food came, too, because I had heard them say it and copying them seemed like a safe bet. When their food came, all three ladies said "Pretty. At one point she said, "At Dolce & Gabanna, we had a breakfast meeting and she said we're expanding." And this was apparently funny because one of her friends guffawed. A nightmare that would be fun to watch on reality TV. One of them was in a bright orange Pucci dress. Seated next to us when we arrived was a table of three glamorous matrons who lunch. Rich: You sat on a giant couch by yourself.Ĭaity: Removed from the tiny ant-like lives of the people around me-yourself included-who were sitting in regular chairs. Removed from the hustle and bustle of other people's tiny, ant-like lives. It feels like you're in a very low airplane. I think more restaurants should be located above ground level, even if it's only a floor or two. The soda I ordered sure wasn't cost-effective and neither were the $3,000 Armani suits being sold (discreetly out of sight) yards away from where I sat, sipping my drinks with m e a s u r e d s l o w n e s s.Ĭaity: The restaurant, located on the third floor of the Armani building, was pretty inside. Lucio had a deep voice with a sexy Italian accent that I wanted inside of me as soon as he said my choice of prosecco was, "Beautiful." The bubbly was dry, but I sure wasn't ).Ĭaity: My Diet Cokes came in tiny glass bottles, which I hate. Rich: Did you catch his name? If not, I'm just gonna call him Ruggero. ("Bring me two of these!" Mademoiselle, you are just pointing to the word "Armani" on the front of our menu.) As it turned out, though, our waiter was quite playful! No walk-away ass bitches work there, that's for sure.Ĭaity: My heart sank when I looked at the menu and saw so many Italian dishes I didn't recognize, because I knew I wouldn't feel comfortable asking for an explanation in that place. In that sense, I felt at home in good old Armani/Ristorante.
Just waiting to be crossed so that they could unleash some catharsis. Rich: I felt like everyone we encountered was on the brink of bitchy.
Cost, including two Proseccos and two Diet Cokes, before tip I don't know if that was a compliment ( "You dress stylishly and clearly don't need our fashion help") or a dis ( "It's VERY expensive").Īrmani/Ristorante inside the Armani store on 5th Avenue. Rich: The employee in the elevator knew why we were there. Caity: I probably go to the Armani store seventy to eighty times a week, but this was my first trip to the restaurant.
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